| interlude vi |
[May. 6th, 2008|10:49 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Soulmate - Natasha Bedingfield | ] |
Incompatible, it don't matter though
'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
You're not easy to find
Is it possible Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you're in disguise
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There's enough for everyone
But I'm still waiting in line
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all good but not the permanent one
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone
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| the one about the painful realisation |
[May. 4th, 2008|12:20 am] |
sayang,
i suppose this is it. as much as i love you and hope for you to return to me, i have to move on with my life. where we both are is what you want. you want your freedom and that is what you get. so i'm just going to let you go, to have your own life and do whatever your heart desire. i am tired of carrying around the heavy load in my heart, feeling sad and angry at myself at times, for causing this pain in my heart. i am shedding all of these weight and moving on with my life, going where ever and whatever life takes me to. for i trust He knows what is best for me, i shall just let fate (or nature) to take it's own course. i've resigned to fate.
i still love you sayang, with my entirety. the hope for you to return is still there, but i just got to make my own life now. should you decide that it is me that you want, you know where and how to find me.
i hope life will treat you good and well. til we see each other again...
i love you always,
nur. |
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| the one about discovering pandora's box |
[Apr. 21st, 2008|12:06 am] |
sayang,
just when i thought my heart is healing, it broke to pieces when i found this on n/i/z/a's blog: http://niza24.multiply.com/journal/item/69/dA_daE_i_meT_zuLikMaL
sayang, you hurt me so bad! how could you tell her everything?! God only knows what else you told her! it hurts me to see the word she typed in her entry:
"It was quite sad to hear from him also dat even after 2 yrs of being together wif her, he still feel dat she jus not da gal he 1 2 b wif."
you have no idea how crushed my heart is right now! how could you, someone i love so much, do this to me?! how could you zul ikmal zulkeflee?! i am so angry with you right now! i feel so betrayed! it's not enough you broke my heart and destroyed my life beyond imagination when you walked out on my life!!! you have no idea what i went through all these months! you keep breaking my heart over and over and yet i still love you! but it seems that i have been reduced to nothing to you now.
zul ikmal, what are you thinking?!
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| interlude v |
[Apr. 20th, 2008|03:55 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | lover all alone - clay aiken | ] |
Maybe I've convince myself
I've really been in love
And I've been wrong along
For all I know the feeling and the picture
That I've tried so hard to find
Isn't mine
Could be it's all just a waiting game
Want to share my everything
And on my own it's hard
To tell my heart it'll be alright
This love it holds
Will one day find a home
As hard as love can be
It's harder still it seems
To be a lover all alone without love
Picking up the pieces makes me wonder
If I only build it all to watch it fall
The faster it can go away it means
The less of me is gone to stay
And I'm okay
But lonesome tomorrow comes anyway
I'm alone for another day, another day
And on my own it's hard
To tell my heart it'll be alright
That this love it holds
Will one day find a home
As hard as love can be
It's harder still it seems
To be a lover all alone without love
And on my own it's hard
To tell my heart it'll be alright
That this love it holds
Will one day find a home
As hard as love can be
It's harder still it seems
To be a lover all alone without love
A lover all alone without love
Maybe I've convince myself
I've really been in love
but I've been wrong along |
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| an excerpt part i |
[Apr. 20th, 2008|03:26 pm] |
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"I love you without condition, Dave. Yes, what's happened has hurt me and yet despite it all I continue to love you with a strength I didn't know was possible. I love you because you are part of me. I love you because loving you is like loving myself. I know that despite all that has happened, you are a good man. And I won't ... I can't give you up..."
- Dinner For Two, Mike Gayle |
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| interlude iv |
[Apr. 20th, 2008|03:15 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | where does the good go - tegan and sara | ] |
Where do you go with your broken heart in tow
What do you do with the left over you
And how do you know, when to let go
Where does the good go, where does the good go
Look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive
Look me in the heart and tell me you won't go
Look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love
Look me in the heart and unbreak broken, it won't happen
It's love that breaks the seal of always thinking you would be
Real, happy and healthy, strong and calm,
where does the good go
Where does the good go
Where do you go when you're in love and the world knows
How do you live so happily while I am sad and broken down
What do you say it's up for grabs now that you're on your way down
Where does the good go, where does the good go |
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| the one about missing you still... |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|11:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  mellow | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Forever - Mariah Carey | ] |
Those days of love are gone
Our time is through
Still I burn on and on
All of my life
Only for you
From now until
[Chorus:]
Forever and ever my darling
Forever
You will always be the only one...
You will always be the only one...
As long as I shall live
I'll hold you dear
And I will reminisce
Of our love
All through the years
From now until
[Chorus]
If you should ever need me
Unfailingly I will return to your arms
And unburden your heart
And if you should remember
That we belong together
Never be ashamed
Call my name
Tell me I'm the one you treasure
[Chorus]
it's been six and a half months since you left me sayang...
i still miss you every single day, every single moment...
and i am still in love with you sayang...
still here, hopelessly waiting for you sayang...
love always,
nur |
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| the one about in between the lines |
[Apr. 1st, 2008|10:48 pm] |
sayang,
the other day i sent you a text message, sharing my good news with you. there weren't any replies from you til 3 days later. thanks for the congratulatory message... i appreciate it a lot, especially from you. but what sent my mind into a a state of disarray was you saying that you've been delaying a reply cos you didn't want to send the wrong message to me. what do you mean when you said that sayang? i asked you in reply but til today, i have yet to receive an answer from you. i kept thinking and wondering what you could've meant when you said that. there were plenty of possibilities but i won't be at ease til i know what you meant. i hope to get an answer from you soon.
lately you've been in my dreams a lot. i usually am not able to recall what was in the dream but you were there sayang. i guess i've been thinking about you a lot. then again, you've never left my mind. i still wake up and go to bed thinking about you. i even think about you throughout the course of my days. i still love you and i miss you every single day. i still pray for you and your well-being, so that Allah will protect you always. and i still hope that you'll return.
i bought a pair of tickets to the musical W/e Will R/o/c/k You for the 12th of april. it was meant for both of us to go together. i know you'll appreciate it like i do. but the question is, will you go with me? i told my colleague, d/i/y/a/n/a, and she told me to go ahead and ask you anyway. i really want to ask if you'd go to the musical with me, but i am afraid you'll reject me. looking at how you're with me right now, the odds are pretty high that you'll turn down my invitation. it'll mean a lot to me that you'll go to the musical with me. however, i wont be surprised if you won't.
sigh...
sayang, why is it hard for you to talk to me properly? why the hot and cold treatment? sayang, do you want me out of your life forever? erase me totally from everything? just say the word and i'll walk and i promise you that you'll never hear from me and anything about me ever again. even if it means i have to leave behind all the wonderful people you've introduced me to, like your family and friends, i'll do it... anything just as long as you'll be happier and at peace. it'll hurt me in ways you will never imagine but i'll find a way to heal. i'll do anything for you sayang, even though it means i have to sacrifice myself and my happiness. that's how much i love you sayang.
i wish you know that i'm still hurting. i wish i know how you are doing. but i think you're doing well cos i heard that you've been keeping yourself occupied with things that you've been wanting to do that i prolly will get in the way of you achieving them. but i do wonder if you still love me.
i miss you sayang. more than you can imagine.
love always,
nur. |
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